solo travel: my favorite solo date (8 lessons I learned)

And a long solo date too!

I have gone on some solo trips over the last two years, both interstate and overseas. And let me say that it’s my favorite kind of solo date!

If had to choose my favorites, I’d say by 2022 New Zealand trip (my first overseas solo trip!) and the 2024 Hawaii trip. My favorite interstate solo trip was when I went to Melbourne in November 2022 (funny enough, I’m moving there in a month!).

In this blog post, I’m going to share with you the 10 lessons I learned from solo traveling using examples from my favorite solo trips.

1 – The accommodation (hotel/Airbnb) DOES matter

Okay, when it comes to accommodation, I’m talking specifically about the location as opposed to how nice the hotel or Airbnb is, and the cost.

I used to believe that if you found the cheapest hotel, you had it all sorted. However, just because it’s cheap it doesn’t mean it’s practical.

For example, when I went on all my solo dates, especially New Zealand, Melbourne, and Hawaii, I chose a hotel that was:

1. Walking distance from key tourist spots
2. Easy access to public transport

When I was in New Zealand, my hotel was in walkable parts of Wellington. That means that I was able to explore most of Wellington on foot. The only time I used an Uber was when I wanted to get to tourist spots that weren’t within walking distance. But most of the spots I wanted to visit were within walking distance (*mind you, my maximum walking distance is 50 minutes because I do love to walk).

The same when I was in Oahu, Hawaii. My hotel was within walking distance of Waikiki Beach, Ala Moana Center, and many other tourist spots and restaurants. Plus, it was close to many bus stops which I used a lot when I wanted to go to further places.

When I was in Melbourne, although I wasn’t within walking distance from the key tourist spots, I was within walking distance from public transport which made it easier to get anywhere.

The common denominator of these places was that it wasn’t necessarily the cheapest accommodation. Instead it was the most practical accommodation location-wise. I’d rather pay extra money for accommodation that’s in a good location and easy public transport access than get a cheap hotel that makes the trip impractical.

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2 – Flexible Itinerary > Strict Itinerary

I’m the kind of person who needs a plan (it’s how I love staying productive) I thought that I would be the person who has to stick strictly to an itinerary when I travel, but I learned that I prefer another way.

I 100% prefer to have a flexible itinerary, meaning that I have a plan on what I’m going to do, and how the logistics work. I also make sure that I get my “tourist spot wishlist” out of the way (the places that I NEED to see while I’m there). However, I leave plenty of room during the later days for the activities or tourist spots I discover or hear about from locals.

When I was in New Zealand, my itinerary for the first three days was filled with the places I HAD to see (aka I couldn’t miss these). For the rest of my trip, I left room for the tourist spots that either a local would recommend to me, or I discovered along the way while I was doing the things on my itinerary.

It was the same when I went to Melbourne. I got everything I wanted to see out of the way in the first three days. Then, the last couple of days of my trip were filled with activities and locations that were added to my wishlist.

It was the same when I was in Hawaii. I made sure to add to my itinerary ALL the activities that I wanted to do and the places I wanted to see. I also made sure to add these reservations:

• Circle Island Tour Bus
• Polynesian Cultural Center
• Diamond Head Hike
• Pearl Harbor Memorial

Once I had these reservations, there were many new places that I wanted to see towards the end of the trip. For example, during the Circle Island Tour that I took on Day 2, I learned that I really to see more of the beaches on the East Side of the Island, and that’s what I ended up doing in the remaining days of my trip.

3 – I learned how to use my intuition

I didn’t need to solo travel to learn how to use my intuition. However, it was during my solo trips that it was put to the test.

Regardless of where I went, there were times when I had a feeling that I should walk in the other direction. There were also times when it was dark and I had a feeling to just get an Uber back to my hotel rather than walk it (even though the walk is short).

Look, I don’t know if any of those feelings were valid, but I didn’t want to find out.

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4 – Self-Belief & realizing how I am much more capable than I think

I’ll admit that solo trips are a huge confidence booster, even more than when I get a good grade on an exam, or I achieve a certain career milestone. I feel like I get an inner glow-up whenever I solo travel LOL.

When I went on my first solo trip to New Zealand, I remember visiting all these beautiful places and thinking to myself “I can’t believe I’m here by myself”. I never thought traveling to New Zealand by myself was a big deal until I got back home and people complimented me for being able to solo travel.

The same with trips to Melbourne and Hawaii. Whenever I’m in places where I’m embracing pretty views, it feels surreal that I’m there on my own.

And I’ll admit, whenever I doubt myself (like in my career or anything else), I remember that if I can travel solo and visit places by myself, I can do anything.

5 – Enjoying my own company

Like yes, you can enjoy your own company with any solo date.

But during solo trips, although there are times when you do group activities, catch up with friends, or be social in some way, you spend the majority of the time by yourself.

When I started doing solo dates, I used to be afraid of looking weird for being by myself. But when I see other people by themselves, I don’t look at them weird, instead, I admire them because they’re just enjoying themselves with no one else.

So I started to look at myself from that lens, especially when I solo travel. I started admiring myself for solo traveling every time I went to a restaurant by myself, visited a place by myself, or went to a group activity by myself where I knew nobody.

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6 – Self Reliance & Self-Trust

Regardless of any solo trip, I went on, I had to learn how to trust myself and be self-reliant, and these things are key to building a good relationship with yourself.

This goes for taking my photos, making sure I get to where I need to be, and ensuring that I keep myself safe.

And this even includes times when I face a bump along the way while I’m traveling and resolving it on my own. But whenever I go through those things, I feel great about myself.

You can learn how to be self-reliant and have more self-trust in other settings besides solo travel. In my experience, solo travel was where I built my self-reliance the most.

7 – Set personal rules for yourself

Here’s what I mean. When I went to Hawaii, I set these personal rules for myself:

1. No going on my phone (like random things you do on your phone like scrolling on social media, playing games, etc) unless I have downtime;
2. Don’t mindlessly go on my phone while I’m visiting a place, doing an activity, etc (enjoy living in the moment);
3. Always have snacks in my day bag… always; and
4. If it’s a HELL no to walking by myself, take an Uber.

The reason why I had these rules for myself was because no one else was going to give them to me. No one else was going to tell me to stop going on my phone and enjoy the moment. No one else was going to give me snacks if I got hungry. No one else was going to keep me safe while I was walking by myself (this was where intuition came in).

These were also little ways to build my self-trust and self-reliance because by sticking to these rules, I knew I could rely on myself.

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8- Time will never return

If I’m being honest, there have been times when I worried a little bit about my finances once I got home.

But then I just remember this – you can always make more money, but you can’t get your time back.

Of course, you should still be smart about your money. However, if you already spent money on a trip, and you’re already there, it’s more beneficial for you to just enjoy the moment and create memories instead of stressing about what to deal with when you’re home.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t manage your money while you’re on vacation and just blow your budget. What I’m trying to say is that if you are on vacation that you already spent money on, you rather leave with the memory of enjoying the place, rather than the memory of stressing about money.

Lol, I don’t know how people will perceive what I just said. But honestly, even though there have been times when I worried about my finances, I look back at all my trips with happy memories because I chose to enjoy the moment and the random things that happened, over the stresses.

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To Wrap Up

Now that I wrote this blog post, I kind of want to post travel diaries on this blog. We’ll see, stay tuned 😉

In the meantime, if you want to check out some of the free personal development resources on this blog, you can check them out here,

-Lauren:)

P.S I suggest you read these blog posts next

• 10 Powerful Lessons I Learned From Solo Travel
• Ultimate Beginner Guide to Solo Dates
• Become the Main Character of Your Life Beginner Guide

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