New Year, New (New Year’s Resolution) Systems

Because new year, new me right?

The end of 2020 and the beginning of 2021 typically meant that it was time to start thinking of new year’s resolutions to kick-start the year.

I’ll be honest here…

I gave up on New Year’s Resolutions… well, at least the way that I have usually approached them.

I’m sure we’ve heard it all before – we end the year feeling pumped about the resolutions we made for the next year, but once the first or second day begins, the resolutions we made have disappeared.

You can actually observe this happen through gyms – in December, there is hardly anyone there but once January hits, the gym is packed. But then what happens in February? The gym is back to its normal capacity.

I have been guilty of setting new year’s resolutions for myself every single year, only to give up a few months or even a few days in.

There were some resolutions that I made last year that were actually accomplished, but years prior, it was hard to stick to many of them.

Based on what I have learned and have written about the past few months, there are a few perspectives on why new year’s resolutions seem to not go our way most of the time. With that, there are also some approaches to overcome these situations with making our resolutions last.

For fun, you will also see me questioning every solution, and coming up with a new problem (but don’t worry, it will ultimately end up resolving).

Problem 1 – The new year’s resolutions are vague

I’m sure we have all heard or even have set some resolutions such as:

• To be happier
• To enjoy life more
• To become a better person

And all these resolutions are good! But what does it actually mean when we make the resolution to “be happier” or “to enjoy life more”?

The downside with just simply making resolutions such as those ones are that they are vague and are not specific enough.

Does being happier mean hanging out with friends more often? Or does it mean incorporating self-care into our lives?

What about to enjoy life more? Does it mean to do a different activity every week or to go on more vacations?

And also to become a better person? Does it mean that we start volunteering in the community or we start reading personal development books?

We may notice that just the new year’s resolution in itself is not clear enough. They don’t indicate exactly what we need to do to follow through on them. This brings us to the solution:

Solution – Make them specific and clear on exactly what you need to do

The resolutions to be happier, enjoy life more, and to become a better person are resolutions that pretty much anyone and everyone would want to implement into their lives. I’m sure that we all want to be happier, enjoy ourselves more, and become a better person overall.

However, what we need to do exactly to follow through on these resolutions is different for everybody.

For instance, two people who want to be happier may approach this in two different ways. For one person, being happier means that they spend more time with family and friends. For another, being happier means that they go do yoga every day.

What about us? What does being happier actually mean to us? That’s something to think about. Like when we think about being happier, what does our mind immediately draw to?

The same with enjoying life more. Everybody has their own definition of fun and different ways on how they enjoy their lives. For some it may be going on more adventures, and for others it may be to not take everything too seriously. Again, when we think about enjoying our life more, what does our mind immediately draw to?

It’s no different with wanting to become a better person. Every individual is at a different stage and have different circumstances in their life, so the changes that they would want to make on themselves would be distinguishable.

So while having these resolutions are good to have, it’s good to consider what they actually mean to us. How we approach them are different. What we do to follow through is going to be different.

BUT there are no actual steps to approach these specific resolutions!! – that brings us to our next problem…

Problem 2 – We don’t have the systems set in place

Sometimes, there may be resolutions made that has no actual planning on how it is going to be accomplished.

When you think about it, a new year’s resolution is more of a goal. While goals are good, they don’t really provide us the actual steps and processes we need to achieve them.

Anyone can make the same new year’s resolution, but what differentiates the one who actually achieves it from the one who doesn’t is the system that they implemented.

For example, two people would make the same new year’s resolution to accomplish higher grades. What differentiates the one who ends up achieving it to the one who doesn’t is the system that they’ve implemented.

This brings us to the solution…

Solution – Focus on and create systems

Since our resolutions are more of our desired results, the systems allow us to have a better idea on the processes needed to accomplish them.

Just like if I had the new year’s resolution to be better at music – my system would be the way I learn and practice playing instruments.

It’s the same if I had the resolution to be more creative – my system would be the way I try out different activities that would allow me to express my creativity such as painting or drawing.

It’s no different with the resolution to eat healthier and exercise more. The way I revise my eating habits and exercise routines based on my needs would be my system.

So pretty much, every new year’s resolution can have a system set in place. It is those systems that we focus on improving that will allow the results to take care of themselves.

If you want to know why focusing on systems are more beneficial than focusing on goals, you can read this blog post – Systems Over Goals – Why It’s Better to Focus on Systems

BUT sometimes these systems require changes that are challenging to make!! – this brings us to our next problem:

Problem 3 – We have habits that are hard to break, and/or we can’t form new habits

Sometimes, it is our habits that would prevent us from following through with our resolutions.

AND there are also times when it is the challenge of keeping up with the new habits that prevent us from following through with our resolutions.

I know for myself that there were resolutions where the challenge of being consistent with a required habit threw my resolutions down the drain. Even though I knew that those certain habits would allow me to accomplish my new year’s resolution, it was challenging to stay consistent with them.

This was regardless on how much effort I had put in and how much motivation I had. It was reasonable to do them, but after a few weeks or even a few days of doing them, they ended up becoming such a hassle. Then it was goodbye to those resolutions that I had set.

There were also my bad habits that stopped me from following through with my resolutions. It’s so easy to fall back into them and are a bit harder to break.

For example, when I had a new year’s resolution to eat healthier, I had to break my unhealthy snacking habit. This may sound familiar, but after a week or so, I thought I deserved a “reward” and before I knew it, I began snacking again.

It took me a while to realise that I was approaching habits the wrong way. This brings me to the solution…

Solution – Focus on the WHO before the WHAT

I have wrote another blog post on this before, where focusing on the WHO before the WHAT was something to think about first when starting a new habit.

I learned that instead of jumping straight to the actions that I thought was required to accomplish my resolutions, I was supposed to focus first on WHO I needed to become to achieve them. The WHO was the identity that needed to be established. This identity was what came with accomplishing that specific resolution.

For example, learning how to play an instrument is the new year’s resolution, but becoming a musician is the identity.

The same with learning how to draw and paint. Learning how to draw and paint is the new year’s resolution, but becoming an artist is the identity.

With the new year’s resolution I once tried to acquire with incorporating healthier foods into my diet, becoming a healthy person was the identity I needed to establish to accomplish it.

So with any new year’s resolution, there is always an identity we need to establish – the person we need to become.

Like with a resolution to become better at our job – who is the person that we need to become? Do we need to be a more reliable person? A more innovative person? A more compassionate person?

Then once we identified the identity, then we can think about the actions that a person with that specific identity would take. We think about what a person who has accomplished the results would do.

For instance, a person who accomplished their resolution to build a profitable business, their identity was being a proactive and innovative person.

The actions that they would take is to manage their time wisely, solve problems effectively, and brainstorm creative ideas. Once we have identified the identity and the actions we need to take (the systems), then there’s a high likelihood of actual following through on those resolutions.

BUT it’s hard to stay consistent with these habits that come with the established identity!! – this brings us to our fourth and (hopefully final) problem:

Problem 4 – Lack of “Why”

The final reason why we may have let go of some of the resolutions that we’ve set is because we lack the “why”. Lets break this down.

I know that there have been times where I have relied on willpower to keep me going with all the systems and habits that I have. I still have to work on this, but I would always rely on willpower to keep me consistent with the positive choices I needed to make. I would also rely on willpower to stop me from falling back into old habits.

It was always so tempting that a couple of weeks into the year after I had set my resolutions, I would slide back into old routines. They felt so comfortable!

I mean, willpower was my only… power. Some years prior, I really thought that I would have consistent healthy eating habits that year. I really thought that I would be better at doing push-ups every day without giving up after five. I relied on willpower a lot.

Little did I know, I was focusing on the wrong thing (what’s new to be honest?). There’s this concept that I really liked when I read The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy. He mentioned to forget willpower but instead focus on why-power.

Solution – Focus on WHY-power over WILLpower

To focus on WHY-power means to have a reason why we want to accomplish all the resolutions that we have set for ourselves.

For us to want to keep going with those changes needed accomplish those resolutions, the why needs to be motivating. What we should consider is that the why is different for every person.

It is the powerful why that would get us through the days when we simply don’t feel like living up to our systems and good habits. It’s the why that would stop us from giving up on our resolutions and get us back into our poor choices.

I really liked the analogy that was used in The Compound Effect – if someone was to put a ten-inch-wide, thirty-foot-long plank on the ground and said that they will give you $20 if you walked across the plank to the other side, I know that I would say yes because it’s an easy $20 to make.

However, if that person took that same plank and put it between two 100-story buildings and told me to do the same thing, I don’t know about anyone else, but that $20 didn’t seem worth it anymore.

BUT, if one of my loved ones was on the opposite building, and the building was on fire, there would be no question that I would walk that plank to save them – regardless on whether I get the $20 or not.

I love this analogy because it shows that it is the why that would allow us to be willing to do anything regardless of the circumstances. Going across the plank to a building that is on fire is risky and dangerous, but that wouldn’t matter if the WHY was powerful enough.

It is not enough to rely on our willpower to let us do the actions required to accomplish our resolutions. We’ve got to dig deeper and activate our why.

BUT …

no buts, I’m stopping here.

Of course we can find more reasons why our new year’s resolutions don’t last, but if we have to keep finding excuses and reasons, are those resolutions really important to us?

If a new year’s resolution is really important to us, it’s best to train our mind to find ways instead of finding excuses.

Overall, we know that just simply setting resolutions for the New Year decreases our likelihood of actually following through on them.

We need to get specific.

Then once we get specific we develop systems.

Then once we develop systems we identify the identity.

Then finally, to keep consistent with all of those systems and keeping up with our identity, we need the why to motivate us.

It’s a nice thought to think that this could be the year where we actually follow through on our resolutions. Maybe if the resolutions we have set in previous years weren’t followed through before, it’s time to approach them in a different way.

After all, we shouldn’t really expect a different result if we keep doing the same thing over and over again right?

Book(s) this post was inspired by:

(not sponsored in any way!)

• Atomic Habits – James Clear
• The Compound Effect – Darren Hardy

Disclaimer: If you think that any of what I had written was good, the credit actually belongs to the one whose book was the inspiration for this post. If there’s anything on here that you think is quite stupid, that’s 100% blame on me 🙂

Share This Blog Post Here:

---

---

CONNECT with ME!! 🗯

Instagram:

@laurenlbarri (blog Instagram)

---

---

Related Articles:

Systems Over Goals – Why Its Better to Focus on Systems

Something to Think About First When Starting a New Habit

The Compound Effect – how it works and how it will change your life