20 Ways to Date Yourself & Build a Better Relationship With You

Because an important relationship to build is the one with yourself

Dating yourself can be a game-changer when it comes to building a better relationship with yourself.

I remember the first time I started taking myself out on dates. I felt nervous and awkward. But as I continued to do more and more, I started to learn more about myself, discovered new things I loved, and my relationship with myself began to flourish.

In this blog post, you’ll learn of 20 ways to date yourself and how it will help you build a better relationship with yourself. Regardless of your relationship status, it’s important to prioritize your self-care and self-discovery.

These self-date activities are categorized into:

Activities where you leave the house
Activities where you stay at home
Activities where you can leave the house or stay home – it’ll be up to you.

If you do other activities that are not on this list, let me know by commenting! I’m the only one that sees it so you can be as open as you’d like.

Now, let’s dive in!

IF YOU WANT TO

LEAVE THE HOUSE

1 – Going on Walks

This is a very popular self-care tip, but it’s very effective! Going on walks helps you with both your physical health and your mental health.

Going on walks can be a way to date yourself because it allows you to spend quality time alone with yourself. While you’re walking, you can focus on your thoughts, look at your surroundings, and connect with yourself on a deeper level.

When you connect with yourself, you build a better relationship with yourself.

When you take care of yourself, physically and mentally (which you can do through walks), you build a better relationship with yourself.

2 – Go shopping

Everyone’s definition of going shopping is going to be different. For some people, it’s going on a shopping spree; for others, it’s window shopping. Nevertheless, it’s a pretty simple and easy self-date idea, especially if you’re trying to get comfortable with going on self-dates.

For instance, shopping is an activity that many people do alone. Since it’s so normal to do it alone, it wouldn’t feel weird if you went by yourself. You can turn it into a fun self-date, and you don’t have to worry about being self-conscious about being alone.

On top of that, doing shopping as a self-date can help you build a better relationship with yourself because you can learn more about yourself that way! When you’re intentional with your spending, you can purchase:

Clothes that make you feel amazing.
Activities that you can try for the first time – e.g. puzzles, art.
Journals
Books
Food to cook

The possibilities are endless!

3 – Going to a café

Another popular activity you can do is going to a café. It’s pretty common for people to go to cafes by themselves with a laptop with them. As we mentioned in an earlier point, the best way to get comfortable with self-dates is to do activities that are normal to do on your own.

There are plenty of different things you can do at a café:

Try a new coffee/drink or food
Read a book
Write in a journal
People watch

But regardless of what you do in the café, try not to go on your phone! When you get off your phone, and spend quality time with yourself at the café, you get used to being in your own company. Getting used to being in your own company is a great way to build a better relationship with yourself.

4 – Tour Your Own City

If you’re not able to get around to traveling anytime soon, touring your own city can be a great way to make up for it! You can experience your own city with tourists’ eyes and discover more about the city you live in.

Taking the time to explore your city can be a great way to build a better relationship with yourself because you can also find new activities you enjoy and even some new spots that you can consider your “happy place”.

Some people often ignore the self-care and self-love tip to discover new things once in a while. It’s when you try things that you get to learn more about yourself.

5 – Go on a solo adventure

Continuing on from the previous point, you can even expand it and do an ultimate solo adventure. Going on a solo adventure is an opportunity to demonstrate to yourself that you are comfortable and content in your own company. You also build more self-trust and self-confidence when you show yourself that you can do things on your own.

Building your self-trust and self-confidence can empower you and make the relationship you have with yourself stronger. Going on a solo adventure is much more than just having fun. It can also empower you in so many ways.

6 – Take yourself to the movies

One of the essential practices of self-care is spending quality time with yourself. There are so many different activities you can do. One example is taking yourself out to the movies.

We’re probably used to going to the movies with friends or family, but it can also be a fun experience when you go by yourself as well.

The best part about going to the movies alone is that you have the freedom to choose the movie you want to watch, without anyone else’s input. And since you’re paying for the movie, you make sure that you are paying attention and not being distracted by anything else. It ensures that you are fully engaged in the experience.

Just like with any other self-date activity, when you’re fully engaged in the experience, you continue to build a stronger relationship with yourself.

7 – Go to the arcade

Personally, for me, I love going to the arcade because it connects me with my inner child and I feel like a kid when I’m playing all the time.

While it’s fun going to the arcade with friends, it’s still just as fun when I go by myself. You get the freedom to choose the games that you want to play, challenge yourself to beat your own high scores, and you can even explore new interests and skills that way!

It’s a great way to build a stronger relationship with yourself because you can truly enjoy being in your own company and not rely on anyone else for entertainment and social interaction. When you get used to that, the relationship you have with yourself becomes stronger.

8 – Take yourself bowling

I know what you might be thinking… how can you do bowling by yourself when there’s no one to compete with?

Well, it’s actually quite normal for competitive bowlers to bowl by themselves to practice their own skills. Aside from that, just like going to the arcade by yourself, you can challenge yourself to beat your high score.

If you want to enhance the experience even more, you can order food and drinks and make it even more fun! I’ll admit that when I did this as a self-date for the first time, it felt uncomfortable at first because everyone in the bowling center were in groups. But, it does challenge you to be more comfortable in your own company. After all, a self-care tip that gives you more self-love is to get comfortable in your own company by spending time with yourself.

9 – Enjoy nature – go to the beach, take a hike, nature/coastal walk, walking trails

Whether you go to the beach, take a hike/walk, or even sit in a park, enjoying nature can be a great way to date yourself and build a better relationship with yourself.

There is something about nature that can improve your mood, release stress and anxiety, and encourages mindfulness. It can help you embrace the beauty around you, and it’s a great way to disconnect from your regular work/studies.

10 – Have a picnic

Picnics are fun to plan and it’s an enjoyable experience as well! (I personally love doing picnics while watching the sunset!).

One of the ways to motivate yourself to do your self-care is to make it enjoyable and reward yourself for doing it. For example, when you do a picnic as a self-care activity, you can make it enjoyable by having your favorite foods and drinks. Your reward is that you’ll be enjoying your favorite comfort foods!

But, the reason why having a picnic can be a great way to build a stronger relationship with yourself (aside from enjoying your own company) is that you can destress (especially since you are out in fresh air), and you build more self-esteem for preparing your own picnic.

11 – Go for a scenic drive

Sometimes, driving can be a relaxing activity, especially if you manage to find scenic routes.

This is also a great activity to do if you’re not ready to start going to restaurants/cafes by yourself, the movies, bowling, or any other activity where you’ll be by yourself. (Of course you need a driver’s license and driver’s confidence for this)

Plus, you can personalize this any way you want! You can drive while listening to your favorite podcast or audiobook, blast music, or just be alone with your thoughts with the windows down. You can explore any places you want because you do have control over what you want to do. Having a sense of independence and control can help you connect more with yourself which is why this can be a great self-date activity.

IF YOU DON’T WANT TO

LEAVE THE HOUSE

12 – Have a puzzle night/coloring/art night at home

If you would like to stay at home, these are a few creative ideas:

Puzzles
Coloring
Painting/Drawing
Legos (I just came up with this as I wrote it, and I’m going to try it!)

Doing anything creative and learning new skills is already a good way to build a stronger relationship with yourself. If you enjoy it, you can make it a regular part of your self-care routine. If you want to spice this up, you can order some food (or cook food!), have your favorite drink, play your favorite music or comfort movie/tv show in the background… the possibilities are endless.

13 – Cook yourself a restaurant-style meal

There are some people that prefer to eat at a restaurant than cooking at home. Whether it’s because of the dine-in experience, the good-looking food, or the convenience of it, it’s more enjoyable for them.

However, if we’ve heard all the health advice, they always recommend balancing and try your best to cook at home. After all, cooking at home can be a healthier and more cost-effective option. But we’ve got to admit that sometimes it doesn’t give the same experience like dining in a restaurant…. Or can it?

Restaurant meals can be so appealing because of how they present it. You can do the same with your home-cooked meal! By taking the time to cook your meal, and present it like a restaurant, it can replicate that dine-in experience.

On top of that, you can enhance the relationship you have with yourself because cooking is a creative experience where you get to challenge yourself and learn new skills. When you prepare a special meal for yourself, you show yourself that you value self-care and you are worth the effort. That’s why, it’s more than just about saving money.

14 – Have a DIY Spa Day (or go to the spa if you want to)

When you think of self-care, most people think of spa days. However, one of the biggest no-no’s of self-care is trying to follow self-care culture and blow up your budget because of it. However, we can all admit that having a relaxing day at the spa sounds amazing and relaxing. But what do you do if you don’t have the budget for it?

If you can go to the spa and treat yourself, go for it! If you can’t, there’s a few ways to work around it.

You can buy towels, a bathrobe, essential oils or candles, and all the skincare necessities and use it only for DIY Spa Days. When you just use it for DIY spa days, it can make the DIY spa day a more luxurious experience.

Even though you’re just at home, it’s a wonderful way to date yourself and improve your relationship with yourself because you get to take care of yourself, pamper your body, and feel more relaxed. It’s also a great way to treat your body with kindness, care, and not stress out as much about your other responsibilities.

15 – Baking

I’ve started baking regularly for the first time and I love this self-care activity! It’s a great creative outlet that allows you to express yourself through the creation of delicious treats.

Just like with the other at-home self-care activities we mentioned, baking is also another activity where you can learn skills and challenge yourself. When you learn shills and challenge yourself, you boost your self-esteem and self-confidence! Those are the things that make the relationship with yourself stronger.

If you want to make this even more fun, you can play your favorite music or comfort shows/movies in the background. You can enjoy your own treats while doing your other favorite activities. You can make this as fun as you want.

16 – Have a Movie Marathon or TV Binge

One amazing way to do self-care daily is actually watching comfort tv shows or movies! It may not be the most creative self-date idea, but it is certainly an enjoyable one. It’s also quite relaxing and enjoyable as well… it’s so easy to do!

Whenever you do an activity that you enjoy and feel relaxed, that is self-care and self-love. Whenever you make time for self-care and self-love, you build a better relationship with yourself which is what you are aiming for.

17 – Order Takeout & Have a Night In

If you don’t feel like cooking, it’s also nice to order takeout (or Uber Eats if you want) and have a night in. I’ll admit that this is always so fun (even though it’s not the budget friendly option).

Nevertheless, this is a great way to spend time with yourself and build a better relationship with yourself. Honestly, it’s a comforting activity for when you want to relax and take it easy. There’s nothing wrong with treating yourself and bonding with yourself that way.

So, put on a good TV show or movie, and enjoy your takeout!

LITTLE BIT OF BOTH

(can be either)

18 – Get your nails done

Whether you go to the nail salon and get them done, or do them at home, this can be a great self—date activity!

If you choose to go to the nail salon, you can buy your favorite drink, bring a book while you get your nails done, and come out with beautiful nails.

If you choose to do it at home, you can invest in a foot spa, relax while your feet are in the foot spa, and do your own pedicure. With the manicure, you can do the same except maybe you can create a hand spa in your bathroom sink… you can be as creative as you like.

Either way, it’s a form of self-care that can help you express yourself more (especially when you have fabulous nails), give you more self-confidence, and allows you to bond with yourself. At the same time, doing your nails can make you feel like you have your life together.

19 – Do a fun hobby

This can honestly be anything you want because every person will have their own set of favorite hobbies. Whenever you do a hobby that you truly enjoy, you continue to have a stronger relationship with yourself.

When you’re doing a hobby that you love and enjoy, it also builds your self-identity and helps you be more satisfied with your daily life. After all, if you’re doing activities that you hate, it’s hard to be satisfied with your life, right?

If you are looking for examples of hobbies, here are some types of hobbies you may want to think of building:

A hobby to enhance your mindset
A hobby to increase your knowledge
A hobby to keep you fit
A hobby to help you be more creative
A hobby that helps you relax
A hobby where you get to meet people
A hobby where you get to help people
A hobby to make you money

Check out the related blog post below on how each of these types of hobbies work.

20 – Have a self-care day

And what exactly is a self-care day? Anything you want it to be!

This can be where you practice your love language on yourself , or where you do more self-discovery.

Taking a day to prioritize your needs, taking care of yourself, and doing things you enjoy allows you to relax and recharge. When you regularly relax and recharge, you prevent burnout and you improve your own productivity as well.

On top of that, you continue to show to yourself that you value your needs and your wellbeing. It’s so important to show kindness to yourself and let yourself have fun regularly because it’s a way to show self-love.

And when you show self-love, you improve the relationship you have with yourself.

Take a SMALL STEP

Pick at least ONE activity that you’ll try this week or this month!

Make it a goal that at least once a month, you try a new activity. If you like it, that means you discovered a new thing you love. If you don’t like it, also great, you discover things you don’t like and never do again.

To Wrap Up

Going on dates with yourself is a necessity to build a better relationship with yourself. From this blog post, you’ve probably seen that self-date activities can range from activities you can do at home, activities where you leave the house, to activities where it’s a bit of both.

If you’re ready to make dating yourself a part of your life, I highly encourage you to check out my Self-Date Workbook along with a list of Self-Date ideas (that is categorized by love languages) in the Free Resources Library! You can sign up for it here if you haven’t already!

In the meantime, remember that taking yourself out on dates is essential for your overall happiness. When you take yourself out on dates, you get used to being in your own company, and become more self-reliance. So go ahead, and treat yourself to a self-date. You deserve it!

-Lauren 😊

P.S I recommend you read these blog posts next:

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Hi, this is Lauren! I’m a law grad from Melbourne, Australia. On laurenbarri.com, I create content on all things personal development, productivity, self-care, and habits! I am super passionate about these topics because of how they helped me in all areas of my life, and I want to share it with others!

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20 Ways to Date Yourself & Build a Better Relationship With You

Personal Development, Productivity + More on Self-Improvement!

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